Proverbial Kick in the Ass....

So yesterday, after a LONGGGGG hard week at work, I came home to an unexpected package on my front doorstep....not to mention Ryan's aunt, uncle and cousin who happened to be up in our neck of the woods and wanted to rid of the 4 cases of wine they were storing for us.  I entertained them for a bit, making excuses left and right as to why we haven't made it to Sonoma to visit...,mostly because of mom and life, but as I was telling them what I had been doing these past many months, it sounded more and more pathetic.  I mean, I went straight from finishing up culinary school which took up 100% of my free time last year, into a spiral whirlwind of taking care of mom, building a chicken coop, being tested for cancer, taking care of my worried dad, and making jam to keep my head on straight.  After mom left us, I started in with the quilts to remind me of our precious time together and to do something with this massive pile of fabric she left me.  Ryan and I started working on the long over due project--the yard...trying to get ready for the infamous Tour de Cluck in May.  And here I am standing in my kitchen telling them all this, thinking to myself, I am absolutely crazy.  And, to top it off, this weekend is my birthday and I could honestly care less.  For those of you reading this and don't know me too well, I am usually a freak about celebrating my birthday....lots of plans, friends getting together, and usually scheduling some freakish activity that no one else would think of doing just to stir the pot a little bit.  (past activities = rollerskating, skiing, eating some weird food at a random restaurant, going to see an 80's cover band...)  I have always loved my birthday and don't mind celebrating all month one bit.  This year, I received many invites to schedule a nice dinner out, go to a concert, and lots of inquiries of the strange activity of the year....and I had nothing to offer.  As I was reflecting on a year lost to wallowing to Bill and Mary Jane, it hit me.  I need a kick in the ass to crawl out of this hole I have dug for myself...so that I can start to be me again.


And then I got it....the kick in the ass....


After Bill and Mary Jane left, I opened the large Fed Ex envelope that greeted me on my doorstep yesterday to find a huge surprise.  Honestly, I saw it was from my sister-in-law, Kara, and I immediately thought it was something for my birthday...but was already surprised since I just received my last year's birthday present from her in February...so I was thinking maybe she was just on the ball this year.  But no.....inside was a legal pad decorated to the nines with a message that floored me.  It really made me teary eyed, as I never would've expected this in a million years.

Of course the answer is "hells yes!"  I immediately called her to tell her that I received it in the mail and that I was floored she asked me.  After I hung up, I panicked.....this means I need to rejoin the world as a normal person, not a hermit.  About time to get back to the gym and lose that weight I packed on over the last year.  Oh god, how am I going to look next to all Kara's skinny friends....AAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHH!  The thoughts were swimming through my head as I was chomping on the pizza I ordered.  Hmmm....I guess this is the last pizza for a while.  Its ok.  It's about time to start back working out and getting cute again anyways.

Now, for the realistic part of all this.  I can forseeably only lose a certain amount and still be healthy, so what should be the goal?  A weight?  A dress size?  I have found that the number is far too difficult to go by, especially since I swing ten pounds over a month.  A dress size sounds intriguing.  Right now I am oscillating having to buy clothes from the "big girl store" or just really large misses sizes.  Maybe that is the goal....get me down to misses only and a smaller size?  Or a combination of dress size and weight.  Her wedding is Labor Day weekend...which puts us at 20 weeks away.  A pound a week and a dress size or two seems reasonable, no?  Now, how to do this...and make jam, make quilts, and not be a grumpy butthead while I train people at work?  Hmmm....Ride my bike?  I love doing that. As a kid, I rode everywhere and I loved it.  The hubby even outfitted me with a basket for a trip to the market, so I can even do the grocery shopping on the bike...and I can start that today!  I haven't been on the greenbelt in a long time, and that sounds fun.  Yes....a bike ride this morning is just what I need to get going.  I just got a new racing swimsuit for working out.  I can start that again this week....but I really need to actually start this time and not just stare at the swimsuit in the bag from Big 5 with the tags still on it.  Anyone want to go with me?  I love having a buddy that I can chat with in between laps.  What else?  I just got those new running shoes for WALKING.....not running.  Running is silly.  But, the weather is so nice this weekend, I could take advantage of that in between doing yardwork.  Yeah.  That sounds good.  Yoga...I could sweat off the pounds....my yoga teacher just opened up a new studio that I still need to check out.  Should I make that my goal for Tuesday?  Hmmm...starting to get a little overwhelmed here.  Maybe I should calendar this all out.  Then I don't have to think about it?  Anyone out in cyberland have ideas?  I have received the proverbial kick in the ass...now I need to get started.

Who's with me?

Off to get something to eat and ride my bike a little.